Mary and Discernment

The feast of the annunciation is an important one for discerners. Mary said "Yes" to God's call. Sometimes when I reflect on the story I am just grateful for her "yes" which was the entrance of God into the flesh of humanity. But then I think about all her "yes" entailed, so much that she had no idea would come about as a result of it--both the wonder of God made man and the pain of a life that witnessed what she witnessed.

It challenges me to accept uncertainty rather than knowing everything that will result from my choices. I find myself wanting to know what a "yes" will mean from now to eternity. A "yes" to the will of God is a "yes" to mystery. All of us who enter into any discernment need to trust that God will provide for us throughout our life. We do not need to know all the things that will follow our "yes."

Divine Mercy

Today is Divine Mercy Sunday. I am thinking of the mercy that Jesus showed to Thomas. When I read the gospel I had a sense that Jesus had really finished his visits but that his concern for Thomas who was pained that he had missed the visit. Thomas was unable to take the word of the others, but something in me felt he was also hurt that Jesus had come when he was absent. But the merciful Jesus would not let Thomas remain in his pain. He came just for Thomas.

Often I am like Thomas. I want evidence--concrete and empirical that God loves me. I am always challenging God to "show me." Jesus' love for Thomas was so overwhelming. I wonder if his asking Thomas to explore his wounds was to be sure that Thomas was aware of his love or if he wanted to Thomas to recognize his own tendency to doubt unless he had even tactile evidence. I want to think that it was Jesus' mercy that desired Thomas' touch and closeness.

Then there are the locked doors that resemble our locked hearts and locked vision. Locks are important when we are afraid. Today, I want to ask Jesus to invade my fearful locked heart and allow me to feel his immense love for me. I want to receive the spirit breathed on me freeing me from all my fears.

Acts of the Apostles

The readings from Acts of the Apostles are wonderful. I am always elated to hear of the power and the healing miracles of the disciples who experienced the Risen Christ present with them. Sometime I ask why we do not still see such wonders, why my faith does not bring the same kind of results. But then the gospel readings have been about the disciples who seem to be looking for Jesus in the wrong places--among the dead, in empty tombs. Maybe I am looking for the signs of Christ, risen and present in the wrond places. Today I will try to alert to the wonders of grace in the people and situations I meet.

Fishing

This morning's gospel found Peter returned to fishing. Was this a desparate act? He had left all to follow Jesus--his nets, his father. Now it had all come to an abrupt end. Did taking up the nets remind him of what was lost? In some ways I could identify with Peter when he was not longer aware of the presence of Jesus. Most of us live in a place where the felt sense of Jesus' presence is fleeting.

Then two he labored all night and caught nothing. Again, I heard a message addressed to me. How I long to see the fruits of my labor. Working without seeing results always leaves me disappointed. But at the suggestion of Jesus, Peter and the others have an abundantly fruitful experience. Some say that the people of the time thought that 153 species of fish represented all of the kinds there were in the Sea of Galilee. So the catch implied that it was the whole fish world that was hauled in.

Did Peter remember at that moment that Jesus had told him he would be a fisher of men? Did he know that he was called not to be a messenger for the whole world?

What stays with me from the story is the image of the net, filled to bursting, being dragged onto the shore. What joy! What abundance! What does it say for me today? Maybe it says that obedience of Jesus is all that is necessary and whether I see results in my ministry or not I can rest in the abundance of God's love which provides.

Fishers

In this morning's gospel Peter went back to fishing. Maybe disappointment that his time as a follower of Jesus had come to an abrupt end. He had left all--even his nets and his father--to follow. But now he is back at the fishing job. Taking up his nets again.

I refelcted on what he was able to do on his own and what he could do when merely obeying the suggestion of Jesus. The image that stays with me is that net--full to the breaking point. What an abundance. And Jesus--they had not recognized him in the shore. Somewhere I heard that the people of the time believed there were only 153 kinds of fish in the Sea of Galilee so this catch of 153 represented the whole world of fish.

Earlier in his ministry Jesus had told Peter that he would be fishing for people. Now this large catch of every kind of fish. Did Peter remember that he will be fishing for people?

My reflection for my own life, was around the frustration I feel when I do not see the results of my labor and the call to merely obey and to be aware that the stranger on the shore is Jesus.

Easter Week

I have been reflecting of the readings from Acts of the Apostles and feeling great joy in the power which the apostles have as they continue to experienc Christ present with them. I long to see the wonders that faith produces. Today I want to rest in the presence of the Risen Christ without looking for the wonders.